me. I like the idea of having a special day set aside for showing those around us that we love them…not to say we shouldn’t be doing this every day; we should. You don’t have to spend a fortune to say “I love you.” Sometimes love is simply
sitting alone in a car, in a dark parking lot, for 2 hours, while your teenage daughter and her boyfriend enjoy a wonderful meal in a fancy restaurant on a date! Sometimes love is simply taking half of your meal to go in a doggy bag, for your mom who is sitting in that parking lot, patiently waiting for you and your boyfriend! Love is when your daughter pauses at the top of the stairs and says, “Good night Mom; I love you. I had a wonderful time tonight. Thank-you so much for driving us.” That’s love.
Love is weird. I know I love my mother, my father, and my sister. I miss Dad. I wish he was still here with us, with Mom. Jan. 21 marked a year without him. I think Mom& McKenzie miss him the most. He was like a father to McKenzie, with her dad living in Oregon. My sister and I have never gotten along great, but I only wish the best for her. She has a good heart, and she is my only little sis! My mom? Well, I can’t even think of life without her in it, period. But, the love for my daughter is so different. I want so badly to protect her and make sure she is safe and happy. Sometimes I have a wave of immense fear because I can’t see the future and know for CERTAIN she will be
happy and safe when I am gone. My consolation is that she is beautiful, highly intelligent, very talented, and extremely capable. We are a small family. She has no siblings, and I want her to never feel alone in life. I just hope one day she can feel a love of God, so she will truly never feel alone. She wasn’t raised religious because I wasn’t raised religious either. However, I was raised
spiritual, and so is she being raised. My unswerving belief in an afterlife has a lot to do with my love and belief about Michael. I do believe in God also, of some sort. I hope one day McKenzie will find something or someone that she can connect with and feel certain of an ethereal existence. She and I have conversations often centered on science and spirituality. I believe they go
hand-in-hand….. Fact & faith! We usually see things very similarly, so this gives me comfort. I hope she will one day see Michael as I do because she can find comfort in Him, through His music and poetry for the rest of her life.
I thought a lot about love yesterday. I have had many lovers in my life, but I can say that I was not really in love with any of them. It’s true I shared love with them, but I was not head-over-heels in love with them. I can confidently say that I have never been in love with another person on this
planet, except for Michael, and I knew it would be this way, since I was a little girl. I have known all my life that I would never be with my soul mate during this life time. I’m not unhappy though, just resolved. My love is for my family, my child, the animals & children of my planet, and my Michael…that seems enough for me.